So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize