That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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