His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You need a sexual gate keeper
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
