Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
