So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Sorry about my life...
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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