are you still at the devil's house?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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