Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
she smelled like a LAN party
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
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