you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
accomplished twins. life is a go
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
