Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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