He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
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