Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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