I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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