He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
