I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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