4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
