it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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