I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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