Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Randomize
