You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize