Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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