oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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