ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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