omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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