Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change