question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
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