Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
