sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
She announced her abortion via fbk
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Green mimosas i think yes
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
