Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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