3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
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