You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
