I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize