go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
