never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
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