My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks