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• (850): View more from Florida

  I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (914): View more from New York

  i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it

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• (818): View more from California

  I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm there.

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?

  (303): View more from Colorado

  my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.

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• (415): View more from California

  I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.

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• (805): View more from California

  On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....

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