Texts From Last Night

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  (323): View more from California

  I'm being pulled over???

  (520): View more from Arizona

  For what!?!?!

  (323): View more from California

  ??? I'm in a cab!!!!!

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  (323): I'm being pulled over??? (520): For what!?!?! (323): ??? I'm in a cab!!!!! http://tfl.nu/d19c
  Replies (8) Good night (960) Bad night (1461)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.

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  (562): omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever. http://tfl.nu/2p77
  Replies (292) Good night (30157) Bad night (13787)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)

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  (718): walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :) http://tfl.nu/3uv4
  Replies (36) Good night (6093) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.

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  (770): I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon. http://tfl.nu/qalv
  Replies (14) Good night (986) Bad night (4434)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help

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  (917): I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help http://tfl.nu/ynln
  Replies (26) Good night (5775) Bad night (2126)
• Favorite

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.

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  (980): when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space. http://tfl.nu/ayzt
  Replies (14) Good night (6228) Bad night (970)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.

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  (210): It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after. http://tfl.nu/tury
  Replies (3) Good night (954) Bad night (1530)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.

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  (905): I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb. http://tfl.nu/q1zp
  Replies (3) Good night (3747) Bad night (930)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?

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  (514): I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!? http://tfl.nu/cwiy
  Replies (16) Good night (1023) Bad night (2320)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.

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  (281): Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have. http://tfl.nu/1d5c
  Replies (10) Good night (3833) Bad night (706)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.

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  (608): Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day. http://tfl.nu/sglt
  Replies (2) Good night (1740) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.

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  (972): I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants. http://tfl.nu/algc
  Replies (7) Good night (1143) Bad night (961)
• Favorite

  (969): View more from

  You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?

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  (969): You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll? http://tfl.nu/xabj
  Replies (2) Good night (1015) Bad night (318)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.

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  (740): Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there. http://tfl.nu/xst3
  Replies (2) Good night (661) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.

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  (320): The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me. http://tfl.nu/rgx7
  Replies (2) Good night (830) Bad night (182)

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