Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call