So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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