I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
