Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize