Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
