Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Can I color on your dick again?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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