I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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