You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Randomize
