i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize