Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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