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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  What? You're not speaking real words.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him

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• (518): View more from New York

  We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill

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• (425): View more from Washington

  The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!

  (253): View more from Washington

  I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!

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