Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
