I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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