final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
