i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
