I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
