Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize